Negotiate on YOUR terms!

Like in sports, don’t let Life dictate to you. Live your life on YOUR terms!

“RIP 30s”. In other words, “Rest in Peace, 30s!” That’s what the sign read, the one that was on my door when I strolled into the office on my birthday—oops, 40th birthday– a few weeks ago. It was a loving gesture, to be sure, mostly from a group of coworkers whom I put through a battery of exercises twice a week in what they’ve come to call “Bobby Bootcamp.” Led by the ring leader, whose name has been omitted to protect the, umm, guilty, they also put together a gift basket of the most thoughtful items. Protein drinks. Nuts and other healthy snacks. Even some blue sports tape, the exact kind I put on my bad wrists when we train. Clearly, the group gave this gift a whole lot of thought. And I’ll never forget it.

And it may have been the best thing that’s happened to me in a while, even though it didn’t start out that way.

Let me explain.

I thought I was okay with it. Turning the big 4-0, that is. I even walked around bragging that I was the finest 40 year old in California, or at least in the top 10. I call it “play cocky”, only meant to make people laugh and smile as they wonder if anyone can really love himself that much. No, not really. I’d even given my brother a hard time weeks earlier when he turned 50. He felt similarly when he turned 40. I didn’t understand what the big deal was, this aging thing. I didn’t feel it when I turned 30, like many men and women do, and I was certain I would blow threw the 40-year mark just as easily. To be honest, I’d been saying I was 40 since I was about 39 years and one month old. That’s because, if anything, getting older strengthened the foundation on which my bragging rights are built when I playfully tease younger guys (and girls) who can’t hang with me and my often crazy workouts. “You can’t hang with a 40 year old?!?” has a certain ring to it. Read more of this post

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No More Freakin’ Excuses

Not Me, Unfortunately

No, that is not me.

Unfortunately.

Maybe 10 years ago, but certainly not now.  BUT, it is the front cover of a great article by Men’s Health Magazine.  We all have trouble getting motivated sometimes.  At the top of things for which we look for and find excuses– often legitimate, I’ll concede–is working out and getting in better shape.  Even I fight that voice that tells me to just go home and relax.  I usually push back with my own voice, usually resorting to one of the following:

  1. Excuses are for Losers!
  2. If you look hard enough, you can always find an excuse
  3. Excuses are for Losers!
  4. To have what others don’t, you have to be willing to do what others won’t
  5. Excuses are for Losers!

Fortunately, Men’s Health is more articulate and helpful in their approach.  In their article, 21 Ways to Overcome Exercise Excuses, you should fine just what you need (at least one or two motivating tools) to get you off your butt and get moving.

What’s Your Diet Vice?

Hello Friends,

A few weeks ago I reconnected with my old pal Bobby through his very informative and inspirational website. Bobby and I met 14 years ago in Silicon Valley at a start-up tech company. He took care of the money (thankfully!) and I took care of the marketing communications. Working with young, eager, and energetic innovators, we managed to have a great time in the workplace; and, because we didn’t have children or many responsibilities outside of ourselves, we found plenty of time to stay fit and healthy.

That life may have very well belonged to someone else. Who was that person? Somehow, I worked all day, and then taught group exercise classes at a gym in the evening. I found time to run and compete in races, including a few marathons. I even worked on my strength in the weight room—not Mr. Bluford-style, of course, but I did my share. And, most importantly, I consistently stoked the fires burning at home with the hubby, managed to be a staunch supporter of Girls Night Out with my peeps, and was a smiling presence at all family holidays, births and birthdays. A skilled juggler! Read more of this post

The Audacity of Success

What do Ryan Seacrest, Jessica Simpson, and Dr. Phil have in common? How about Tony Robbins? Or Arnold Schwarzenegger? Oprah Winfrey? Kim Kardashian? Yes, they are all extremely successful, but that’s not the answer I was looking for. What else? Lucky? Maybe a little, but we all have a little luck in our lives, even when we don’t choose to acknowledge it. Extremely gifted or talented in their chosen fields of endeavor? Nope. That’s certainly not it.

Okay, I’ll get to the point. The other day I was talking with a colleague of mine and I mentioned I was re-reading Tony Robbins’ The Power Within. For some reason, I was a little embarrassed to admit that. After all, even I think he’s a little, well, corny. Like many, if not most of us, I find myself talking trash about people who, let’s be honest, are a lot more accomplished than I. “She cannot sing!” Or “He’s a joke?” “How the heck did they give her a television show?” And “What is his talent, again?” In one form or another, we are saying “Who do they think they are?”

The Audacity!

The Audacity of Success. Read more of this post

Life is Cumulative

My wife hates when my son and I play catch in the house. She’s always yelling that little kids shouldn’t play with balls indoors. She also thinks my son shouldn’t. (We have a running joke in our household that my wife has three children- our son, our daughter, and me.)

My response is atypical, though. I actually find a way on most days to defend what my wife sees as infantile behavior. I tell her that with each catch and throw, our son is becoming a better athlete. More coordinated. More comfortable. With better hand-eye coordination. What I try to convince her of is that people get better not from the formal practice and training we do. Rather, we get better from the informal events. I tell her that we humans can only have class or practice with our team or group a few times per week. That we can only afford so many hours with the private piano teacher that comes to our home after school. I tell her hat because of work and other obligations, as well as weather; we can only go to the park so often. Read more of this post

You Choose What You Get

Believe it or Not- It's Your Choice!

Instead of “You can’t always get what you want,” The Rolling Stones should have called their song “You DO always get what you want.”

Because, brace yourself.  If you are unhappy with any part of your life, there’s a good chance you chose it.  I can see you shrugging your shoulders and smirking at me, but hear me out.  It was hard for me to admit to myself, too, but most things that present themselves as a source of anxiety or fear or unhappiness are that way because the alternative is worse.  Whether subconsciously or knowingly, we are deriving more pleasure out of what we see as misery than we are from the other option or options in our lives at that moment. Read more of this post

Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate

“Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond
measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us. We ask ourselves,
who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, handsome, talented, and fabulous? Actually, Read more of this post