Dont’ tell me what you’re gonna do..

My friends and former teammates from college know how to finish this sentence:

“Tell me what you did!”

What does that mean?  Well, this is the perfect time of year to explain.  A little more than one more day before 2011.  Another year gone by.  Another year to look forward to.  And alas those dreaded New Year’s Resolutions.  “I will lose ten pounds this year.”  “I’m going to stop smoking.” “I’m going to stop procrastinating and start working out.”  What’s yours?  More importantly, what was yours last year?  Do you remember it?

Well, try the approach that I adopted long ago.  Don’t tell people what you’re going to do.  Just do it.  (This sometimes gets me in trouble with my wife, but she’s come to understand that I like to surprise her with positive stuff ) Because quite frankly, they don’t want to hear you SAY you’re going to do it.  It’s likely, if you’re telling them, that you’ve told them before.  They want to see you actually DO it.  And what I’ve found is this:  If you have an internal promise, one you make to yourself, it will drive you and motivate you more than any external expression of that goal can. 

Now, you can still look forward to showing those important to you that you’ve accomplished your goal.  In fact, I  suggest you do.  I suggest you imagine the look on their faces when you reveal to them that you’ve “done it!”  It’ll drive you.  And rather than feel the pressure from others- real or imagined- as time passes or the deadline you put on your goal approaches, you’ll have internal pressure, pressure you put on yourself.  Rather than feeling distress, you’ll feel eustress.  This is the good type of stress, the type that inspires and motivates you.

So, instead of voicing your New Years Resolutions to the world this year, instead of promising to change, instead of telling people “what you’re gonna do,” just write them down for yourself. Put them in a safe place for your eyes only.  Then, later this year, when you’ve accomplished your goal, walk up to someone you care to and “tell them what you did!”